Beauty

Psalm 17:15 "I shall be satisfied, when I awake, with Thy likeness."

What would it take for me to wake each morning satisfied in knowing that I am like the Lord? Better yet, what would it take for me to wake each morning content in my efforts of attempting to be like the Lord?

Holiness. Quite a perplexing word to many; and to myself I must admit.

In my efforts of continuously seeking to be a whole person, I am persuaded that the only way to do so is to constantly seek holiness. If I'm focusing my efforts on becoming like Christ, or HOLY, then my efforts are unintentionally to be made whole. So, in order to BE like Him, I have to KNOW Him, and if I desire to KNOW Him, I must worship Him in the beauty of His holiness. Sproul states, "It is the loveliness of inward purity and outward sanctity that pleases the thrice Holy One". I want to be found worshipping Him JUST because He is holy! I want to live to see His face shine down on me!

He is such a beautiful and awesome God! I will praise Him because I am fearfully and wonderfully made! Unlike any artist that we may know of, he creates something beautiful from NOTHING! Our minds can't fathom that! His hand in your life creates the story of "In the Beginning" and not just "Once Upon a Time"! Just in the sound of His great voice rest the beginning of EVERYTHING! I will ascribe to the Lord the glory due to His name, and I will worship the Lord in the splendor of His holiness (Psalm 29:2).

What I have written below, is something the Lord gave me for those moments I'm feeling a little confused about who I am in Christ. I wrote it several months back. It branched from this continuous phrase I daily repeated to myself, "When I think of who YOU are in me, you always remind me of who I am IN You!" I know that everything makes full-circle and relates back to Him; therefore, may this give Him glory and cause others to desire to be like our heavenly Father; our Creator and beloved! I just want to make Him smile!

THE BEAUTY OF HOLINESS

Do you see what I see when I look at me?

Sometimes I must admit, I just can't see quite clearly.

I look, then gaze, even stare intently.

I see dimly and just walk away.

All around me this world is falling...falling...falling.

The crumbling is so loud,

yet faintly, I hear You calling.

You want me to be "like You", you say?

To walk like you and speak like you?

To be your hands and feet

to be the very essence of Your next heartbeat.

But Lord, oh Lord, this is much too hard a task.

I cover up Your loveliness with a horrifying mask.

I look at my reflection, and its ugliness I see,

for once again I've covered You up with the outer shell of me.

I say I live to see Your face, and worship You in beauty,

so God, once again, if You see fit, can You shine Your light right through me?

For You are pure, and You are Holy

You are the "In the beginning" and not just the "Once upon a time".

Your faithfulness and mercy, they astound me every time.

My defender who is always for me in the midst of troubled time!

You have lavished such great love on me,

and given me a greater joy.

You are my righteousness and guiding Spirit.

And how could I forget Your peace?

Yet I can't quite understand why You can do such things for me

in the constant state I am.

Why? Why? Why?

And THEN, I remember...

When You look at me, the mirror shatters.

For Your light needs no reflection.

Though I see dimly, you see me through Your light,

that radiates right through me!

When I begin to think of who You are in me,

the memories flood back of who I am in You!

I am a representation of your purity and holiness.

I am the story of "In the beginning",

and not just the "Once upon a time"!

I am living proof of Your faithfulness and mercy that astounds others,

and I'm the one that You fight for when I am weak so often times.

I am love to this falling world as Your spirit guides me through it,

and I lay my head in peace each night as You hold me securely.

I AM BEAUTIFUL!

Not a mere reflection of You in all Your splendor,

but a glass in which You shine straight through for only greater glory!

So...

Do you see what I see when I look at me?

Thankfully, its no longer me I see in me!

*Just a little piece of what God's continually doing in me! Praise God!

Linked with:

Don't Make Me Come Up There!

With all of my daily activities, I must admit that I have to prioritize my schedule, ranking what is most important to me. One of those items of importance is checking the blog posts of Kristen Welch @ http://wearethatfamily.com/ Do I personally know her? Nope, but I feel like I should. Just another mom out there in the world. Loving her family, living out her calling, serving God with EVERYTHING she has to offer, and having fun along the way! Her blogs are uplifting, inspirational, and challenging! So, though I keep a busy mom schedule, it's always worth the time to check out the antics of We Are That Family!

Recently, she has published a book entitled, "Don't Make Me Come Up There! : Quiet Moments for Busy Moms! I'm excited about having my own copy soon! In fact, I'm hoping to win my own copy. The challenge posted on one of Kristen's recent post was to submit a photo with your best "Don't make me come up there" face or book cover reinactment. So, for your viewing pleasure, Bella gives her best imitation of "mommy's serious face"! It's so much more cute with the over-the-glasses glare! Enjoy

No More Paci, the Big Green Monster, and the Power of Written Language…

It’s been a long week in the Evatt house.

Last Saturday the hubby and I got away for the first time in a long time to Hilton Head. We really had an amazing time together, but all weekend long I couldn’t help but feel terrible for my mother-in-law. You see, Nate had only been using his paci at nighttime and naptime, but when we got the call from Loretta 45 minutes from arriving in Hilton Head(also Nate’s bedtime), we realized we had something very important in the car with us; Nate’s paci! Whoops! He was forced to give it up cold turkey! Nana had to deal with a few minor episodes, but we returned to a little boy who was now one step closer to his “big boy” days.
Back home, we were so thankful for our time together and our many hours of sleep we enjoyed, because we came back home to Ms. Marleigh. She so patiently waited on us to arrive home before getting sick. Wasn’t that sweet? A trip to the doctor on Wednesday confirmed a cold. What? That was it? I really thought it was something more, and by Saturday (her 5th day into the fever), I was positive it had to be something more. It definitely was…RSV with a sinus infection on top! Poor thing! Those three letters are scary! This only meant one thing to us; the big green monster was due a trip to torture Marleigh! You know what I’m talking about; the brain sucker they send home with ya from the hospital! (For all you technical folks, the bulb syringe.) The big green monster has been the greatest form of torture to all of our children(emotional therapy will probably be required in the future); and though the screams of terror break my heart, its coming was imminent. Thankfully, with the aid of the big green monster and some good meds, Marleigh did not have to receive any further breathing treatments and didn’t have to be hospitalized, as I had feared for the worst. She’s getting right back to normal, and we are so glad that we stocked up on some rest on our trip to Hilton Head! (I wish that really were possible to do!) Pre-medicated Marleigh worried us through the nights with her breathing, which meant NO sleep for mommy and daddy. Now that she’s medicated, she keeps us up at night due to her peppy albuterol treatments. Oh the joys parenthood!
However, through all the sleepless nights and scary moments of sickness, one of my most blissful moments in life occurred through the use of eight simple letters! As I jumped in the bed one night (way too late), I threw the 10 million pillows to the floor to uncover a very special notebook. Since Bella’s start to K-4, she and I created a special Mommy/Bella journal. We don’t use it every day, but ever so often we will write each other a special note or draw a special picture, hide it under the other’s pillow, and let the other find the sweet surprise at bedtime. Up until this point, Bella has always drawn me some pretty pictures, with added stickers of choice, but this one was different. For the first time, Bella used that wonderful combination of letters to spell, “I love you!” Now to some this may be no big deal, but to me, this was such a cherished moment! I thought the days that I brought my children into this world would mark the best moments of my life, but I realize more everyday, as my children grow in knowledge and stature, that moments like these continue throughout life! They seemingly trump one another on a consistent basis! All to help me realize the love of my heavenly Father!

The Evatt's Beautiful Mess remains a beautiful mess! (Just in case you were wondering!)

Just for kicks, leave a comment with what the big green monster is called at your house.

I Only Masquerade as Normal

I got out of bed this morning with a purpose! Today was the day! The first day of a “better” me. After a weekend of procrastination, sickness, and just general “blahs”, I decided my life needed a little tweaking! I was annoyed by my own inconsistency with life. Though I spend my days in routines for kids, making chore charts, staying on top of paperwork, pursuing my education…etc.(That list could go on forever), I have lacked in my own foundational tasks. Immediately I was off to the kitchen where I found my marvelous husband (who let me sleep in) to discuss my plans with him. First off, I made a list of 9 things that could use a little(or a lot) of improvement in my life. Out to the side of those things, I jotted down some realistic goals on ways I could improve on each one over the next eight weeks! Finally, I mapped out what my new weekly schedule would look like and hoped to follow it over the next 8 weeks to start new, healthy habits in my life.
Feeling quite silly about my type “A” self (having to make my pretty little lists and charts), I needed a little reassurance that this was feasible and a good idea. Wesley, knowing me all too well, just listened to my plans but wasn’t really impressed overall. (Honestly, I think I annoy the snot out of him with all of the lists I make for EVERYTHING!) Nevertheless, I went about my business in an attempt to follow through with my great 8 week plan. It just so happened though that God gave me the confirmation and reassurance that I needed during my “scheduled” devotion and prayer time. Isn’t that just like Him? My particular devotion was about how we all, as humans, fall into our times of inconsistency, then find ourselves crawling back seeking stability. Right in His arms is where I found my stability to and encouragement to embark on my 8 week plan to becoming a better me. Wesley likes to call it my “Joel Osteen Plan”! Regardless of what you call it though, it’s improvement, and THAT is a step in the right direction.

Trying to be a World Changer, While Living the Life of a Professional Diaper Changer!

I walked into the building for a time of receiving friends for the family of a dear precious lady known as Mama Edith. I expected the mood to be very somber, but much to my surprise, the room was filled with a mood of celebration; not that she was gone, but in knowing that she was no longer trapped in this world. Her soul had taken flight, and she was now singing the eternal praises of her Heavenly Father! As I walked through the packed room to view the body, I thought back to my first meeting with Mama Edith.
It was our church’s first mission trip to the small town of Shiloh, SC in July of 2009. I’m fully convinced it’s the hottest place in this great state with the largest bugs on the planet! Flatlands of fields for miles, with homes scattered sporadically. We were to sleep in an old store building, which belonged to Mama Edith. When we arrived, I automatically questioned my being there! Having decided to take our entire family, I doubted my ability to make it the entire week in such a hot place with little Nate, who was 3 months at the time! As for doing any mission work, well…that just seemed out of my range. I immediately had a rotten attitude about making the trip, and though I tried my best to mask it, I’m sure it was still evident to others. At our first meal, we met Mama Edith. I had previously heard story after story of her life. She and her husband owned and operated the store there in Shiloh back in the time of integration. She was also a librarian at a nearby school and played the piano in the Shiloh United Methodist Church up until she was in her 90’s. She and her husband were very influential in the Shiloh community. Often times they would give groceries to needy members of the community, knowing they would never be paid back for their hospitality. They were always very giving! Though racial tensions were very high during that era and somewhat remain that way today in that specific area, Mama Edith was friendly to ALL! It was known by everyone around that Mama Edith was color blind when it came to the color of skin, thus becoming the forerunner in Shiloh for integration. Even at the age of 95, that was her goal for us while we were there on mission; to further bring together two races.
Meeting her that first night was interesting for us all, especially me! She talked and talked, telling her stories to all that would listen, and repeatedly telling us how thankful she was that we were there. She just knew that something great would come of this trip. And then she turned to me and little Nate! Over and over again she repeated how awesome it was that I would make this trip with little Nate. She was fully convinced that even at his tender age, he would get so much out of this trip. She continually acknowledged what a good mother I was to realize the importance taking my kids on mission trips early on in their lives.
Good mother?! Oh my! I was so glad, at that particular moment, that her vision was not the greatest. Hopefully she hadn’t noticed my rotten attitude about being in this hot place called Shiloh. It was at that moment, I learned who Mama Edith really was. She was a world changer! From the time she entered this world, up until the very day that she left, she was out to make a difference. Not for herself, mind you, but all for the name of Christ. Every good deed…every act of kindness…every word of hope… was all for the name of Christ. Her name was not world renowned, but her name was highly recognized in the little town of Shiloh. She changed the “world” of Shiloh with every day she lived! Needless to say, God spoke to my heart in that moment through Mama Edith, and my perspective changed about my journey to Shiloh. I was able to enjoy the rest of my week there, and couldn’t wait this past summer to take Marleigh on her first mission trip to Shiloh at the age of 4 weeks. I was very excited as well to introduce her to Mama Edith!
Now, looking at her sweet face as she lay in her coffin, I was amazed at the full-life she had lived! Her impact was evident as I stood there over her in the crowded store building. More importantly to me, she had made an impact on my life as well! I never knew the place of Shiloh, SC existed, but now it is a place that can’t be easily forgotten. It’s the home of a world changer! If I could only live up to who she thought I was!
There are so many days that I feel absolutely trapped as a mommy. I want to be out changing my world, but alas, I’m stuck at home changing diapers instead. I fail to remember that you don’t have to GO anywhere to be a world changer. Mama Edith didn’t have to leave Shiloh to make a difference in “her world”, and while I am “stuck” at home, I don’t have to leave these 4 walls to make a difference! My kids need me to be Christ to them! If I only change the atmosphere in my home over the next few years, then I have become a successful world changer!
Luckily, I am pleased that I know some of Mama Edith’s family. They are part of my family as well. I look at them and can see a little of Mama Edith in them all! What a legacy she passed down! I want to have a legacy worth passing down just as she did. I want to change my world for Christ, even during these times that I’m stuck changing diapers all day long. May her spirit of serving continue to live in each person she came in contact with, and may the family of this precious lady find comfort and joy in the mantle that now lays on them. Let’s go forward and change “our world”!

Con Brio!

As every “good” mother knows, we sometimes need a time-out from being mommy! I’m quite certain that even the best of mommies sometimes reach their limits and are faced with the decision to just go off or break away for a few moments of solitude. Sadly, all too often, I choose the first, but I do try very hard to take breathers every now and then. In my house, there’s only one place for those moments of solitude; you guessed it…the bathroom! The bathroom seems to be my refuge on a daily basis! For those moments I just can’t take anymore, I can always run to the bathroom, lock the doors for a moment, say a few words of frustration, a prayer for an exceptional measure of grace, then it’s back to the grind. I’ve been impressed here lately just how well these moments of peace throughout my days seem to aid in my sanity. I usually walk back out of the bathroom to a new mess or some sort of catastrophe, but at least I’m able to face it with a new and gracious perspective!
Sometimes I even have these moments out and about, because my kids NEVER take a break from being kids. Having one of those moments at my in-laws house the other day, I slipped away for a moment into the guest bathroom. I absolutely couldn’t take anymore screaming! Feeling a bit overwhelmed with my decision to become a parent in the first place, I tried to clear my mind by selecting one of the magazines from the basket of reading material provided by my mother-in-law. On top of the stack was a magazine published by Furman University’s Music Department called Con Brio! Being quite a music nerd, I could appreciate the play on words. It was cute! I flipped through the book, caught up on all the latest Furman music news, said my usual prayer for added grace, and was ready to face reality again. However, God wanted to speak with me before I headed out, so I stopped to listen, of course! As usual, God tugged at my heart about something so simple and obvious, yet very precious and weighted! The title of the magazine repeated over and over in my head; Con Brio! In musical terminology, it translates as “with brilliance”! That was it. Very simple, yet very prolific! It was then my job to walk out of my confined space and live my life “with brilliance”! This moment was very defined more than ever with God’s grace and mercy to me! So many times I’m overwhelmed with my mommy responsibilities, but God doesn’t want me to live a stress-filled life, just “making it” from one moment to the next! He desires for me to live my life “with brilliance” before my children, in an effort that they will see Him through me! What a responsibility!
I left the bathroom with added zeal, knowing that in those few precious moments, God chose to speak to my heart! I was encouraged that now when I reach those “mommy moments” and have to run to the bathroom and take refuge, I can now always be reminded to walk out living my life “with brilliance”! So glad that God is no respecter of the places He speaks to our hearts!